Circa 1997, two mid 20’s begin to discuss and pray about what life might look like if they were to join forces in matrimony for the purpose of glorifying God for the rest of their lives on earth together as one. Many late night conversations pondering what the future might hold were had over the ever present coffee mugs in our lives. While many of those dreams have fallen by the wayside, some have danced in and out of our lives since those infantile moments.
As one might expect when discussing marriage, the thought of children was discussed. I believe the subject was broached in a clumsy manner such as this: “how many kids do you want?”. As if a mere number can define the shape of a family. So naive we were. I think I said 2, she said 4 and I immediately thought, we will have to work this out later. But I will get my way. 2 is the right number. I grew up in a family of 2 siblings, she grew up in a family of 2 siblings. She will come to reason I am certain.
Fast forward to 2000, our first child arrives. Korynn Kathleen born a beautiful blue eyed girl that immediately steals Dad’s heart. What a joy it is to be a father is the thought, unknowing to the challenges that lie ahead in parenthood. 1 down, 1 to go....so I thought.
2002 brings us to the arrival of child number 2. Lily Grace blesses us with her presence and at the same moment poses an interesting question. If we stop here, the Rogers name will not continue. The tree stops here, as it were. Well in modern Christendom, there's this sort of unspoken "rule." You are allowed to have two children unless they are both of the same sex. If that be the case, you are permitted one more try (but only one) to see if both X and Y are working.
And so it was, our 3rd attempt. 2004 and the question comes as we sit in the falsely comforting OBGYN office, “do you want to know the sex of your child?”. No, we better not jinx ourselves. If we find out, God might not give us what we want. Reverse psychology always works on God, right? The month of April brings about the birth of our third child, Reese Khristopher. The bloodline continues.
And so, that is the saga of the Rogi (our plural version of Rogers) and how we came about. Shortly thereafter, Papa Rogers visits a man with a sharp knife and the fathering chapter is closed.
Fast forward to November 2010. Life, though not perfect, is good. Three growing, healthy, smart, cute kids and we got this parenting thing down. We are even crazy enough to say that we will handle their education at home, thank you very much. And so, in the midst of a self inflicted busy schedule, date nights are scarce. I thought it best to use my birthday as an excuse to do two things I like very much, hang out alone with my wife and watch basketball. I like it so much, that is what we did on our wedding night. After the ceremony and reception, before leaving on the honeymoon, we went to our hotel, ordered a pizza and watched basketball. What a great wife!
And so, on this cold November night, we enjoy watching the basketball Buckeyes beat up North Carolina A&T. 102-61. The conversation is light and fun as we head back to the hotel for the night and a quiet, late night dinner. “Remember when” becomes the topic as we think back over the 12 plus years that God has given us together. And then the questions fall out of my mouth. “Remember when, we were dating and discussing how many kids we were going to have? Remember us both saying that we might some day be open to the idea of adoption? Have you thought any more about that?”
You see we had not once discussed the possibility of adoption since we were starry eyed in love when we could do no wrong in each others eyes and long before our quiver was full with three arrows. Who needs more than 3 arrows?
And then her response. “Yeah, in fact I was researching adoption on the web this week.” I don’t know if you believe in signs or not. I am not sure if I believe in signs or not. But this was an amazing coincidence if it was not a God orchestrated moment. I was content with 3, what caused those thoughts that night, what caused those words to come out of my mouth? What are the odds that in 744 weeks of marriage that this would be the week that she would begin researching adoption? We asked those questions. The conclusion was that it was no coincidence. And so we began to seek God daily in this matter.
By Christmas 2010 it is evident to both her and I, that she will have her way, we will have 4 children, if the Lord allows. Unless of course, there are more to come.